Abandon Text!

W. H. Auden once said: "Poems are not finished; they are abandoned." I have been abandoning writing projects for many years, since only the pressure of deadline and high expectations ever got me to finish, or even start, anything of merit. This blog is an attempt to create a more consistent, self-directed writing habit. Hopefully a direction and voice will emerge.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Depressed . . . or just tired?

I have found, of late, that it is absolutely impossible for me to differentiate depression from physical lack of sleep. Sometimes I'll get up at what seems like an early-but-not-too-early hour, having gone to bed a little earlier the night before, and I'll sit at my desk, and I will not have the faintest desire to do anything. Anything I think of to do -- work, write, read, balance the checkbook -- seem equally gray and lifeless. I might spend a few minutes in that state, thinking that this is it, I've finally hit the mid-life crisis and life will be forever joyless. Then I remember, and I go back to bed for an hour or so, and when I get it up it's a different picture.

David Wilcox had a song about this subject: "It's physiological, in a logical disguise -- you're just down inside yourself." I suppose the converse is true -- those times when life seems good and all is well, it might just be the coffee talking.

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